Hilariousness
by OveliaGirlHaditRight
Summary: Me, somewhat trying to guess what the Master of Master's tale could be like, based on what we know from canon thus far.


**Author's Note: I have to thank the amazing BlueRosesBurnBlue/BlueRose729 for a lot of this-and yes, this is dedicated to her for that reason, and since I know she loves the story we're learning about the Master of Masters in canon!-as she helped me edit the piece, and came up with the idea of the camping trip... when I knew I needed one more friend with Superbia with his friends, but couldn't figure out what it should be.**

**So if anyone likes this story, you should give her some love, too**

**And Liz, dear, I hope you like the changes I made here. Thanks for everything!**

**Hilariousness**

Superbia didn't know how to explain the world he'd been born into. Was it, at first, perfect like those misinformed thought the later "age of fairytales" to be?

A large part of him would have had to say "no" to that question, for darkness had possessed all of his friends and horrific Wars had happened again and again.

But the caring part of the man that still existed, at least in part, would have had to say "yes", because he remembered too well his frail, male friend—who he'd loved with all his heart—and his tough as nails girl friend, who liked to cook more than anything else and had even had that power on the battlefield (that Superbia had eventually become horrified of)… and how he missed both of them, even to this day.

…

_It was hard for Superbia to understand why Them had such anxiety about everything, since they had been led into such a perfect world—even if it had peculiarly been black as pitch right after they'd been born for a while—but even with Them's insecurities, Superbia could still have a good laugh with him: something that meant more to Superbia than perhaps anything, since he himself was a very humorous guy._

_"So... what do you think this monstrosity of a monument is?" it was Ash—Superbia's gal friend—who asked this, as she kicked said statue beneath the three of them, and even probably nearly broke her toes in doing so. In Ash's constant desire to be unruly, she wasn't always careful to make sure she didn't hurt herself._

_The council that ruled the world had decided to make a memorial for _the _horse—the one that, legend said, had created this World before it faded away; though Superbia didn't buy it at all-but this piece of art didn't look like the aforementioned animal. And while Ash hated the statue the most out of all of the friends (probably because she actually did adore horses and the story of Fire), it was Them today who had come up with the idea of just insulting Fire in their hang-out._

_And it _was _fun… Superbia enjoyed wry senses of humor, after all—and his friends meant a lot to him, so he'd always be here for that—but he was also a bit bored. He didn't care about religion at all, after all, but rather discovering the new. Like right now, he was fiddling with a circuit in his hands, that he thought could eventually make light… but he'd entertain his friends with his thoughts on it all, anyway. "Whoever designed this made it look less like a horse, and more like a dirty pile of clothes that someone left on their floor."_

_Ash and Them laughed at him, and Superbia blushed... though there had been a part of him that hated himself for it, because why should he be shy about things he was good at, like being witty? Surely the council was wrong when they said arrogance was connected to darkness. Superbia was quite proud to be able to see something of worth within himself, and shouldn't everyone have felt the same? Like, Them was thrilled with himself when he could get serious when the situation called for it, and Ash when she actually succeeded in making something cold—like ice cream—as opposed to her warm dishes that she was usually much better at…_

_And perhaps that was why Superbia, in a very conceited manner, decided he was going to destroy the World to bring those two back when it took them away from him. They were the only two (well, them and one another) who were like Superbia at all, and he couldn't stand to be alone… it was too horrible. His entire world was too horrible, really._

_And it was because of a certain trip in particular, that he would realize that: when comparing the joy from there with the later pain he would feel._

_…_

_After the three had almost reluctantly spent time together at that statue, they had decided to go camping together. What could they say? They were getting tired of the stifling feeling that was the council and the city…_

_Sometimes, Superbia thought that the people in charge of the World knew more about certain things than they were letting on, and that that was why there was always such a sense of foreboding in even a peaceful time. But as a kid, he didn't dwell on it much. And he mostly wasn't dwelling on it now… even if part of him _didn't _know why they'd opted to go into the off-limits wilderness now, that actually that for a reason and why he would eventually keep the Key Kids away from it…_

_But in the past, when the outdoor adventure was taking place, all that had mattered to Superbia was having a good time with Ash and Them._

_Nearly the moment they'd set down on some of the bluest green the trio had ever seen, Ash was making s'mores for her nearest and dearest—using her magic to do so—and Superbia couldn't get over how perfectly she cooked them this way. It shouldn't have been shocking, really, since she was the type who could make crème brulee at the drop of a hat, but Superbia cherished how she got enough char on the s'mores to give them flavor… but at the same time, gave it barely _any _of that: so that no professional chef, who cooked the traditional way, would dare say that Ash burnt her food… ironically._

_"So, tell me how your powers work again. And what this 'nothingness' is," Superbia attempted to make conversation with Them, as he got started on the hot dogs, the moment that it seemed like Ash had at least ten s'mores already created._

_…Superbia technically thought that _Ash _should've been doing this… but since she_ always _saw to all of their needs when it came to cuisine—and this was a vacation of sorts—Superbia opted to step up to the plate just for once, even if it annoyed him some._

_"…I know it's hard to understand—since we haven't experienced it ourselves, and hopefully never will—" Them answered after a beat; just when he seemed to find the proper words, and enough strength to say them and have his voice carry, "but 'nothing' is essentially an end to everyone and everything. And I can touch this… variable—even though it hasn't happened for us yet, and the fact that I can do so makes me worry that it eventually _will—_and then add something to it… as a way to counteract the entropy it would otherwise lead to… Again, that's also hard to explain—even to myself—I just have a certain knowledge about it all. I don't know…"_

_Superbia and Ash just stared at Them for a long time after that—no doubt looking like gaping fishes as they did so. And the _real _irony, later, would be when Superbia understood all of this and tried to fight against it_himself. _Or when he later used someone named "Xemnas", who had a corrupted version of Them's powers, because the World had been destroyed—and then burst out laughing._

_"Wow, Them!" Ash exclaimed, as she held up another s'more in her hands and placed her blue light on it—what her abilities looked like, when she called upon them—that then burnt it… and Superbia got the feeling that Ash's doing this was her attempt to try and understand what this "nothingness" was, that Them spoke of. What? Did she think by burning the food enough, it would eventually disappear? "You've quoted textbooks before… but that was still _really _something. But, hey: you're speaking! So I can't at all complain about it!"_

_And maybe it was because Them could tell that Ash really _did _appreciate getting to know him better, that he took the burnt s'more she'd just made, and wolfed it down before Superbia could get a hand on it himself, since he would have just insulted Ash's "mistake" the entire time he ate it… and Them had clearly realized that._

_And while Superbia should have been insulted by this—and maybe even jealous, that his friends seemed to be going in a certain romantic direction that would eventually leave him behind—he'd been struck by their purity, and how much he wanted to protect that and them._

_And suddenly inspired by that purity, Superbia tackled his two friends to the floor while he held their unfinished tent in his hands. And since they somersaulted while still in the air, each of them showing off, before falling back down, the piece of fabric landed before any of them did and so they were then laying on it on the ground… And it didn't take long for the trinity to have a giggle fit, as they then tried to roll on top of each other and tickle one another: Them being the one to try and do so the most._

_"Come on!" Superbia said after a half-an-hour of it, deciding to be the responsible one again as he helped the other two up. "Let's find a way to make this tent… before we give up on it, and just use it as a bed tonight and have _no _shelter from the elements."_

_But If Superbia had known then, that he would soon see his friends' bodies laid out on the ground, he may have foregone building the tent and just used it as a mattress … since the fact that they all eventually laid down on the ground, even beneath the tent, was now tainted in his mind when his mind's eye saw bodies at the Keyblade Graveyard._

And speaking of that cold, hard ground… present day Superbia was now reminiscing over why he loathed it so much… and how he was trying to be nice to Ava, so she _wouldn't_ betray them, so none of the Foretellers or anyone else would end up on it themselves.

_Superbia remembered most what it had been like when Ash had been possessed by the darkness. The vibrant personality that he had admired in her had completely dimmed and faded: words that he would give to his Foretellers about himself eventually._

_She became nearly comatose, and seemed unable to see or react to anything. And if Superbia hadn't known any better, he would've thought she was dead: if it weren't for her eyes twitching in certain reactions to things._

_But then she ended up coming back to life with a _vengeance. _When they were fighting in a War against the darkness—and Superbia finally perfected a certain weapon he'd designed—he became afraid of her powers for the first time ever._

_She put the darknesses in a vat, in order to cook them, and he remembered how their eyes widened as heat engulfed them… and how they tried to wriggle away from the embrace that held onto them and forced them to stretch into a different shape, before eventually even being pulled apart, but they were unable to do it._

_But as difficult as it was to watch all of this with Ash—and her powers grow out of control as she slaughtered darkness after darkness this way, and even some lights by accident—it was even worse seeing Them, who'd always been so timid, pull everyone into the void as if it was his destiny to do so and nearly destroy everyone and everything—as he yelled how they, everyone, and everything was wrong… so very wrong._

_Superbia was someone who had, even before all of this had started, thought he was the best—he'd figured out how to make keys out of hearts, hadn't he?—but when he was needed most for this first War, he found himself laying down in the fetal position as he cried and prayed (him, praying?!) for everything to be over._

_…And soon, it was. Why the darknesses had passed over him, Superbia would never really know. Not even in the present. But they'd left him alive, while Them and Ash were decimated; Superbia could only imagine the darkness had eventually wised up, possessed them, and told them to off themselves. But maybe the darkness had somehow possessed the land, too, because even it was scorched and covered only in blackness._

_This should've been the end of all of Superbia's torment; and in some sort of alternate world, he'd like to believe that it was, but it certainly wasn't in this one: some in Daybreak Town had actually managed to survive, and they repopulated enough that Superbia found himself in another of what he had (almost arrogantly) dubbed a "Keyblade War," after the weapons he'd designed. Only this time, it really could be called a "Keyblade War," as he'd given these manifestations of the heart to every person with potential he could find._

_But this time when the darkness entered the people's hearts... they seemed less othered, and more like themsleves. And Superbia didn't know what to make of that, or how to take it; he wanted to believe this meant the world could eventually fight back against the darkness, even if it gripped them, but he'd long ago stopped being that hopeful._

_And this second time, an ice sculptor named Music—that Superbia had fallen for a certain amount, as Music helped him escape from what he'd seen Ash do—died in Daybreak Town, as the darknesses decided to target there first, instead of what they'd created as the Keyblade Graveyard... and Superbia figuratively lost his heart over it._

_And it was when a third Keyblade War came around, that he started to have an idea: the Keyblades he'd created could do pretty much anything... and he was done being in distress, and was beginning to see certain things, too._

_He would put his eye into his No Name (what he'd eventually decided to name his Keyblade, because in Superbia's own mind_, he _was really nothing. He hadn't been able to stop_ any _of this)—and pass it down, so he could see all of time and try and fight whatever fate decided that Keyblade Wars had to happen to keep the universe in balance-and this time be able to save the upcoming six children he could already tell he was going to love… and perhaps some more kids even after that, who were also going to have it too hard._

_Because by the point that Superbia—in his mind's eye—could tell that a fiftieth Keyblade War was soon (soon for _him, _with his future sight now) coming on the horizon, he decided it all had to be stopped, no matter the cost.. even if he had to become darkness himself, to do it._

_And if that also meant he'd finally be the sacrifice he wished he'd been, so Them, Ash, and Music hadn't had to be it… then so be it._

_Maybe as he fell himself, he could even see their smiling faces and touch them once more. And in that deranged way, he had hope… in a way that wasn't hilarious at all, except that it was._

_**Author's Note: I actually didn't want to give the Master of Masters his own trio... since it's so overdone in this series, tbh. But three people really are the perfect number to write for, so it still happened... And Nomura would do this, so perhaps it helps to make the story feel canon like I want it to. But I decided to try and put a spin on it, where one of the guys was pretty weak-in some ways-and the girl was super strong... which I guess is more like the Wayfinder Trio than any other, except that you could maybe say that Them and Ash's budding romance is a bit like Sora and Kairi's, and Superbia has some Riku connections, then.**_

_**I also decided to make Superbia LBGT to make this fanfiction not too cookie-cutter what we've seen in Kingdom Hearts so far. And it seems to fit with his character to me. -shrugs-**_


End file.
